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Of course sexual performance - if that's the right word - is as much dependent on emotional mood and physical conditions as any other human function. Sex can be ecstatic and passionate or comfortable and cozy, with intense or gentle orgasms, depending on how the couple feel, how aroused they are, how closely connected they feel, and , of course, how passionate they are. The problem is that many couples do not take a realistic view of their sex life and they therefore expect to have massive orgasms - to feel the earth move - on every occasion they have sex.

Where the man is dominant, in the man on top sex position, he needs to exercise a degree of conscious control over his movements and his arousal – the urge to thrust is incredibly powerful in this sexual position, so he may need to slow down from time to time or he may need to halt his movements completely so that the duration of sexual intercourse is increased and his partner gets an opportunity to become fully involved, so she gets more sexually aroused; intercourse will be then satisfy them both sexually. How long sex should last is a matter for each individual couple, but the answer is usually something like "it should last for as long as it takes until both man and woman feel sexually and emotionally fulfilled".

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The side and rear entry position is an exciting sex position, and it adds to the woman's pleasure because his body presses against the back of her thigh and her vulva. He gets into this position by entering his partner partly from the side and partly from the rear of her body so that her leg is drawn up and wrapped around his waist. In this situation he will need to support his weight with both his arms and hands.

When a woman's beneath the man during sex she may want to become more involved in the sexual action by wrapping her legs around his back and pulling him in close to her. The close association of their bodies can actually produce a very pleasurable friction on the clitoris, especially when his pelvic motions are circular or form a kind of side to side rocking motion. Unfortunately it's not a sexual position which can be prolonged because his movements are somewhat restricted and she may become tired. Even so, kissing and fondling can continue and deep genital penetration is possible. The female partner can stroke and caress the man's back, holding him close, running her fingers up and down his back, touching, kissing and enjoying the close contact with his neck and face; moreover, his chest rests on her breasts. This is an extremely helpful position when the man's penis is short and he can't penetrate the vagina particularly deeply since it gives some of the deepest penetration possible.

Deep penetration is enhanced when the woman puts her legs up on the man's shoulders; he can get very deeply inside her, and this is an exciting variation to the man on top sex position. However, not all women feel comfortable with it because it represents a position of high vulnerability. In addition, the sexual action is almost all with the man, and although the sense of helplessness can be exciting for the woman, she may not be too happy spending a long time in this sexual position.

Social expectations have of course changed as times have gone by, and today there are rather few women who would be satisfied with a sexual encounter that consisted of nothing more than swift penetration, swift ejaculation and disconnection. Nonetheless, while more men are more aware of how it necessary it is to satisfy a woman sexually (i.e. give her an orgasm), it's also true that anxiety about sexual performance can leave men over-controlled, perhaps even disconnected from their sexual and ejaculatory urges.

Certainly for men with delayed ejaculation, men who cannot ejaculate easily during intercourse, the prolonged thrusting that comes with an awareness of the need for ejaculatory control, or with some natural subconscious over-control, may become both mechanical and disconnected from the emotional intimacy of sex.

Even so, it's true that changing awareness and a change in sexual attitudes have produced various changes in male sexual behavior. It was only 40 or 50 years ago that Alfred Kinsey regarded ejaculation with two minutes of intercourse commencing as so common as to be normal. These days although, in my opinion, the ejaculatory performance of most men has not changed, what has changed is that men are aware of the need to satisfy a woman by taking her to orgasm during intercourse.

The question of how a man can give his partner most sexual pleasure is highly individual, and men should not be embarrassed about asking that very question of their partner in a relaxed way during sex. What's even more important is that both the man and the woman continue to explore their sexual potential, relaxing into an intimate connection with their partner so that they can achieve more spontaneous pleasure while still being focused on the experience they are having and remaining sensitive to each other's sexual needs.

So, for example, when the man is in a sexual position on top of the woman it's necessary for him to ensure that she can adjust her movements so that she not only increases the pleasure of the sensations in her vagina, but also that her clitoris receives adequate stimulation. One way of doing this is to orient their bodies so that their is continued contact between his pubic bone and her clitoris; alternatively, he can use his fingers if her vulva is accessible.

An alternative sexual position which allows the couple to get increased mutual sexual pleasure is for the woman to place her legs between the man's, and for him to squeeze her thighs with his - although the woman has very little movement in this sex position, she will find the extra pressure on her vulva very arousing, and his penis is tightly fitted into her vagina. She can wiggle a little, and she can contract her PC muscles to provide great sensation.

For some women, putting her legs out flat and widespread will position her clitoris to receive stimulation as the man thrusts into her in the man on top position. However, he needs to support himself on his arms, and rock his pelvis back and forth. An alternative is for him to provide a teasing side to side motion which will rub and stimulate the whole of the woman's vulva. If a man's supporting himself on his extended arms, the woman can put her arms round his neck and draw him closer to her.

Men sometimes express a more sensitive side to their sexual nature, and women often wish to express a more dominant side. So within any sexual relationship that is truly satisfactory between two people, there should be ample opportunity for both man and woman to express all aspects of their inner selves.

In the woman on top position, it's possible for a woman to express her feminine sensuality and eroticism to a rather greater degree than she can with the man on top where he takes the active role. The very act of taking the dominant position – the dominant physical position as well as the dominant psychological role – gives her more freedom of movement and allows her to feel less burdened by the weight of her partner; indeed, this sex position allows her to move in such a way that she's more likely to be able to reach orgasm.  Kama Sutra Sex Positions

Women on top sex positions actually allow the woman to enjoy the pleasure of taking the man's penis inside her at the time and in the way that suits her best, and they also give her a choice of various pelvic movements that might enable her vulva and clitoris to receive more friction than they would in any other sexual position. They also offer the possibility for the man to learn how to control ejaculation better than other sexual postures. Kama Sutra Positions In Pictures

When a woman is squatting over the man she can get very deep penetration and with 100% control of the depth of penetration. This works better than in almost any other sexual position – which is extremely useful if the man has a long penis which would otherwise make contact with her cervix during intercourse. And for men, the woman on top position for coitus can be a very relaxing experience: not having to be "in charge" of the movements and progression of sex may come as a huge relief, not only when a man is tired or would like some respite from the role of leader, but also just simply because he can experience a more submissive sexual role and position.

Not only that but he can enjoy the sight of his partner and the whole experience of her sexual expression, which may allow him to relax more into the passive side of his own sexuality. The Kama Sutra Sex Tips